stayb100ponyboy | Accidental video

Accidental video

[The SFC feed clicks on, showing a small, darkish bedroom and someone wrapped in blankets like a cocoon, completely swaddled and hidden. The feed rolls cheerfully along for a moment or two, until the blankets shift, falling away as the person under them props himself up on one elbow, his back to the camera. Even without seeing his face, it's pretty difficult to not recognize Equius Zahhak just by his size and broken horn alone.

He reaches out with one hand, fumbling for something on a small table on the other side of the bed. The camera catches just a glimpse of a glass full of water before it shatters in his grip, the breaking sound almost unbearably loud in the otherwise silent room.

Equius' shoulders roll forward, hunching in around his chest, and he appears to study his hand for a moment, watching a few trickles of blue blood run down his fingers, before he grunts and pulls the blankets back over his head. The blankets move around him as he curls into a ball and sighs, deeply, before he stops moving.

The feed keeps running for another couple of minutes before it cuts off.]

[OOC: backdated to before this thread, and the morning after the curse wears off.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[OH GOD NO]

You go ahead.

[Gamzee shrugs.]

Aight.

[Equius will have to get used to the taste of faygo~~-flavoured kisses~~ eventually.]

[Faygo-flavoured kisses are one thing. Faygo-flavoured Faygo is something else all together.

Now that he's feeling better, Equius suddenly realizes what a terrible host he's being.]

Can I offer you some breakfast or anything, while you're here?

[You think Faygo is terrible? Wait until you try Equius' cooking.]

You cook?

[Gamzee looks excited and slightly surprised at that. If Equius can cook, they could cook together! But at the same time... Equius didn't look like the type that could cook.

It's mostly the whole CHAOTIC STRENGTH thing. Cannot be useful in the kitchen.]

[Oh no, what has he started?]

Not very well...

[Just going to trail off here. Using the microwave counts as cooking, right? Taking things out of the thermal hull unit and putting them on plates counts as cooking, right?]

[Only if you are a bachelor.]

You're just fuckin' full of surprises, aren't you, motherfucker? You ain't all looking like the fuckin' type for cooking. I thought you spend all your motherfuckin' time done making your robros.

[Equius is pretty much the definition of bachelor ~~for now~~.]

The robots take up a lot of my time, yes, but I have to eat, don't I?

[Carefully, he slides off the bed and gets up. Thankfully, he was still wearing his shorts and tights when he went to sleep on the night the curse started, so he's wearing them again this morning. He's shirtless, but whatever, the Highblood has already seen that.]

After Aurthor... left, I had to learn pretty quickly.

[He wears a low cut sleeveless tank top. There is not much hidden to begin with.]

He used to do that for you?

[Gamzee's goat never had. Not because he was away all the time but, his ol' goat had never fitted inside his hive. Never been able to go on land for more than a little bit. Besides, he had been too big for cooking anyway.]

[Does that imply that the Highblood has been looking?]

Yes, he did. He was quite talented in the kitchen.

[Or Equius just has no palate and didn't know any better, shhhh.

He slouches into the kitchen and opens the specially-reinforced thermal hull unit, studying its contents. He eventually selects a pair of what the humans call "breakfast burritos" (a recent discovery down at the supermarket), and tosses them in the microwave, still in their packages. He sets the device for two minutes and watches the burritos turn. Soon the hive is filled with the smells of melted cheese-goop and refried beans with extra MSG.]

Microwaves aren't cooking. They just be magic.

[Wise words of, uh, wisdom? Sorta? Still, Equius can be sure that no matter what he makes, whether in a microwave or not, Gamzee is going to eat it. He has the tastebuds of a dead fish and the digestive track of a goat. Nothing is getting by him.]

[Equius shrugs; while he might understand the principles of how microwaves work, he also can't argue that they're pretty darn magical.

The burritos are done. He opens the microwave, picks them up gingerly by the corner of their wrappers, and walks back to the bed. Sitting on the edge, being careful not to bump Gamzee's knees with his own, he offers him the burrito that got slightly less-squished in his STRONG grip.]

Here you are.

[Plates? What are plates? Plates are things that get broken if he even looks at them wrong, that's what plates are.]

[Luckily table manners are not something that ever concerned Gamzee anyway. He was raised by a goat. Badly at that.]

Thanks, bro.

[And now it is time to try and open the burrito contraption without either burning his fingers or making a mess of Equius' bed. Again.]

You're welcome.

[Equius rips open the packaging without any trouble--he's been eating a lot of these, okay, he knows how they work. He manages to take a bite and swallow before he notices that Gamzee is having trouble with his.]

Here, there's small tab near the top. Pull on that to open it, and then you can use the wrapper to protect your hand and still eat.

[Gamzee tilts his head, listening to the instructions before trying it and... holy troll jegus on a unicycle that is amazing. Who had come up with that, man?! Who?! Who had managed to create such a miracle as mircowave-able burritos with easy to open wrappers for not burning your hands?!

The world is so beautiful.

And Gamzee just staring at his burrito in rapt amazement? That is totally a thing now.]

[Equius quietly eats his own burrito, not bothering to break the Highblood's concentration. If he would rather stare at his breakfast than eat it, that's fine with him.

Once he's finished eating, though, he quietly clears his throat, hoping to get the other troll's attention.]

If you like those, I can show you where I got them.

[And Gamzee's eyes turn to him, still amazed by all the little casual miracles all around him.]

You be fuckin' meaning that, brother?

Of course. Finish eating that one, and we'll go get you some to take home.

[Equius gets off the bed, making its springs creak alarmingly, and goes to throw his own wrapper away. That done, he pulls a clean shirt out of the Shirt Pile (doing a valiant job of place-holding for the Robot Pile he intends to make later, and shrugs into it. After pulling on a pair of gloves over his bandaids, he's ready to go.

Or stay here. Or whatever.]

If you are all like sure you are feelin' better again.

[He finally pulls the tab on the wrapper on his burrito so he can start eating. Hey, making Equius happy is what he came here for. Even if the magic of microwavable burritos distracted him shortly from it.]

I do feel better now, yes.

[Equius sits back on the bed, waiting patiently for the Highblood to finish his breakfast. Except now he has a problem. Those burritos have so much salt in them that he's thirsty again, and the only liquid in the house he can concievably drink is... the Faygo.

He eyes the bottle mistrustfully. At least it's half empty now and he could probably hold it himself without it overflowing.]

Would you... pass the Faygo, please?

[Oh, Gamzee's face just lights up at that. He loves sharing his Faygo with people. Especially when they actually ask for it which happens... never.

holding out the bottle, he grins just a little teasingly.]

Got you diggin' the wicked motherfuckin' elixir, don't I?

[More that there isn't anything else in the house, but whatever makes you happy, Highblood.]

I suppose so, yes.

[He takes the bottle and takes another tentative swig. Okay, when he's braced for the blast of sweetness and knows what to expect, it's not that bad. Not necessarily something he'd seek out, but not terrible either. And it makes the Highblood so happy to share it... well, he can indulge occasionally, he supposes.]

[Gamzee quickly finishes the last of his burito, waving one hand around in a vague explanatory gesture.]

It's the motherfuckin' bomb. I ain't all get why you motherfuckers don't like drink this shit all the fuckin' time. I guess it tastes a lil' sweet bein', but it's good.

[Equius looks at the bottle in his hand, and realizes, to his surprise, that he's almost finished it off. He offers the last swig to the Highblood.]

I think, if you warned people first about the sweetness, they might be more willing to try it.

[Because let's be honest, he's the first one to ever drink it twice, isn't he?]

[Karkat did, but only when he was higher than a motherfuckin' wood and tarp structure on a string.

Gamzee happily accepts the bottle back, quickly drinking the last swig. His tongue flicks out for a moment to catch the last drop from the mouth of the bottle, before he captchalogues the empty container into his miracle modus. Can't litter!]

It ain't even that fuckin' sweet.

[Getting to understand how screwed up his taste buds are yet?]

I still think you might get a better response if you warned people first.

[All the tact, man, he has it.

Equius offers his ghost half-smile to the Highblood, then stands up again.]

Shall we? Let's go get you some burritos to take home.

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